The Grammar Of Good Communication Prison Wife Stand By Your

Relationship Friendship Compatability Love Advice Information.


Home      
How compatible are you and the person you are with'

What You Absolutely Must Know About the One You Are With!
How compatible are you and the person you are with? How would you know? Just because you like the same types of foods and pets does not mean that you can have a blissful, long-term relationship.

50 secrets of blissful relationships - Power of astrology - The anatomy of an affair - Unhappy relationships - Dating information


Share |


You are free to use content from this page in your blog or website, in return for a link back to this page from that blog or website.



The Grammar of Good Communication


No, this is not a rehash of primary-school grammar; nor is it a discourse on the finer points of rhetoric!

There are some practical points which can make a powerful difference in the efficacy of your communication -- whether on the job, with your spouse or when you are among friends.

What is "good communication'" Much of what passes for conversation is a play with two performers, each impatiently waiting for the other to finish so they can declaim the lines they've been preparing as the other is talking.

Good communication is using words to express meaning -- clearly, efficiently and without ambiguity. This is most important in the communication which takes place between two people who want to make themselves understood in order to have a useful exchange of significant information about themselves or their relationship.

This information is likely to have an emotional component, and may be a complex mixture of fact and feeling. This is typically the language of relationship, though in reality many relationships are rather devoid of this level of communication.

I read a research study long ago which looked at the quantity and quality of communication between spouses with children. The overall amount of communication between spouses was surprisingly small (twenty minutes a day, or thereabouts); of that some eighty to ninety percent was spent talking about the children, the day's schedule, plans to be made, or tasks to be done. Only some ten to twenty percent (of the twenty minutes!) was "relationship talk" between the spouses, where they shared feelings or meaningful dialogue about the nature of their relationship.

The need for more quality communication within marriages is the subject of another piece. Here I wish to make some structural or grammatical suggestions which can greatly enhance the efficiency and accuracy of complex communication.

It is important to make "I statements" -- sentences which begin with the word "I". "I feel tired today;" I am upset about X;" "I would like to go out to dinner tonight,". A common colloquialism in America is to say something like "You feel mad when someone cuts you off in traffic," when the meaning intended is "I feel mad when someone cuts me off...".

Attention to this simple structural detail of communication will greatly add to clarity and increased understanding. Too much important communication is muddied with vague or imprecise language. Of course, sometimes it feels safer to hide behind ambiguities or vagueness than to say what is really felt.

The little word "but" is very important -- it subtly but firmly negates all that has gone before. "You look nice in that dress, but...". That word signals the listener to pay particular attention to what follows, because there is the real point of the message! "I like you a lot, but..." In emotional or relationship communication, "but" is a slippery character. It allows the speaker to say all the right things in the first part of the sentence, and then slip the verbal knife between the ribs with the "but."

"Never" and "always" are likewise tricky words -- and rarely accurate. Communication which includes statements like "You always..." or "I never..." are likely to generate more heat than light. Life is rarely so simple that something is always or never the case.

In everyday speech, we often confuse feeling and thought. "I feel that the world would be a better place if..." is not a statement of feeling (emotion), but a thought or cognition. Relationships between people are based upon emotion; we are constantly listening for the subtle cues in conversation to see where we stand, or how our friend/spouse/lover is feeling towards us at this moment. Clarity in labelling emotions and thoughts helps the listener know how to receive the message.

Precise communication which captures the richness and nuance of emotion as well as thought is learned behavior. None of us is born knowing how to communicate clearly. It is possible to improve relationships by improving communication. Simple, direct, clear and unambiguous communication with those persons who are most significant is a skill well worth learning.

David Yarian, Ph.D. is the creator of The Guide to Self-Help Books, http://www.Books4SelfHelp.com and co-author of Self-Help Central, an ezine to help you build a better life with self-help resources. He is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist in private practice in Nashville, TN. His professional website is http://www.DavidYarian.com.


Cat 267


English Grammar Workbook for Dummies by Geraldine Woods (2011, Paperback,...
ebay image$11.99
End Date: Friday Mar-9-2012 20:45:29 PST
Buy It Now for only: $11.99
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

PSYCHOLOGY AND THE NURSE~Frank J O'Hara~1939 1st Ed~Illust~Good Condition
ebay image$7.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 3:51:29 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

MORRIS WEST THE SHOES OF THE FISHERMAN AN EX LIBRARY BOOK GOOD CONDITION BARGAIN
ebay image$1.79 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 3:51:54 PST
Buy It Now for only: $2.49
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

Analyzing English Grammar by Thomas P. Klammer; Muriel R. Schulz; Angela Della..
ebay image$40.40
End Date: Sunday Feb-19-2012 8:46:45 PST
Buy It Now for only: $40.40
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

CHATEAUBRIAND;1853 2 VOLUME AUTOBIOGRAPHY.HALF LEATHER BOUND GOOD COND.
ebay image$31.69 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 3:54:01 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Shurley Grammar Level 1 Student Workbook
ebay image$9.60
End Date: Thursday Mar-8-2012 20:01:32 PST
Buy It Now for only: $9.60
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Good Housekeeping Best One Dish Meals Cookbook
ebay image$4.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:13:13 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

BEFORE I SAY GOOD-BYE by Mary Higgins Clark HBDJ ..
ebay image$1.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:21:36 PST
Buy It Now for only: $2.99
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

Easy Grammar Grade 6 Teacher Text
ebay image$32.95
End Date: Thursday Feb-23-2012 14:28:22 PST
Buy It Now for only: $32.95
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

10 WAVERLY NOVELS HARPERS THISTLE EDITION BY SIR WALTER SCOTT GOOD CONDITION
ebay image$99.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:31:27 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Understanding and Using English Grammar 4th Int'l Editi
ebay image$40.99
End Date: Monday Feb-20-2012 17:48:23 PST
Buy It Now for only: $40.99
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

8 WAVERLY # 2 NOVELS HARPERS THISTLE EDITION BY SIR WALTER SCOTT GOOD CONDITION
ebay image$99.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:31:27 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids by Amy Nobile and Trisha Ashworth...
ebay image$0.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:44:00 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Analyzing English Grammar by schulz klamme 6th edition
ebay image$41.88
End Date: Monday Feb-27-2012 7:13:20 PST
Buy It Now for only: $41.88
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Introduction to Communication Disorders by Kimberly A. Farinella, Dale Evan...
ebay image$59.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:45:05 PST
Buy It Now for only: $89.99
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

Sentence Essentials: A Grammar Guide
ebay image$19.94
End Date: Saturday Feb-18-2012 14:09:29 PST
Buy It Now for only: $19.94
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

GOOD HEALTH THROUGH AGE 120 Dr. Marcus Laux PB
ebay image$0.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 4:55:42 PST
Buy It Now for only: $1.50
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

WHAT SNAKES IS THAT? SNAKES OF THE U.S. CONANT AND BRIDGES 1ST HC/DJ GOOD+
ebay image$25.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:05:55 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

NEW Grammar in Use Intermediate - Murphy, Raymond/ Smal
ebay image$18.47
End Date: Wednesday Feb-15-2012 3:26:33 PST
Buy It Now for only: $18.47
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

How Good People Make Tough Choices: Resolving the Dilem
ebay image$10.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:09:35 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Business Communication Essentials by Courtland L. Bovee and John V. Thill...
ebay image$47.00
End Date: Tuesday Feb-28-2012 20:09:16 PST
Buy It Now for only: $47.00
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

G antique books 1900 Bennetts Latin Grammar
ebay image$10.00 (2 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:09:58 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Business Communication Today by Courtland L. Bovee a...
ebay image$19.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:11:50 PST
Buy It Now for only: $24.99
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

NEW Understanding and Using English Grammar - Azar, Bet
ebay image$48.82
End Date: Friday Feb-24-2012 10:19:37 PST
Buy It Now for only: $48.82
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Jimmie Walker (Good Times) The Dyn-O-Mite Kid USED Paperback Book
ebay image$3.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:13:55 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

NEW Fundamentals of English Grammar, With Answer Key -
ebay image$48.60
End Date: Tuesday Mar-6-2012 9:11:10 PST
Buy It Now for only: $48.60
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Too Good To Be True (HB) -- Jan Harold Brunvand
ebay image$3.15 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:15:48 PST
Buy It Now for only: $4.15
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

Introduction to Communication Systems by Ferrel G. Stremler (1982, Book,...
ebay image$8.95 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:15:56 PST
Buy It Now for only: $10.95
Buy It Now | Bid now | Add to watch list

Managerial Communication: Strategies and Applications by Geraldine Hynes 5E (G)
ebay image$37.88
End Date: Thursday Mar-1-2012 20:34:44 PST
Buy It Now for only: $37.88
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Harkness' Latin Grammar (1867) & T.Macci Plauti Captivi (1916/Latin)
ebay image$3.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:20:37 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Textiles (11th Edition), Sara J. Kadolph, Very Good Book
ebay image$58.68
End Date: Friday Feb-24-2012 18:12:35 PST
Buy It Now for only: $58.68
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

Very Good - Pillar NT Commentary - The Gospel According to Matthew - Leon Morris
ebay image$30.00 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:42:34 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Lighten Up book by Charles Platkin Used Good Cond. SMOKE FREE HOME
ebay image$0.99 (0 Bids)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:51:31 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Fix it! Grammar and Editing Made Easy with the Classics
ebay image$30.00
End Date: Thursday Mar-1-2012 19:47:18 PST
Buy It Now for only: $30.00
Buy It Now | Add to watch list

1902~THE SKY PILOT~Ralph Connor~Rare 1st Edition~Illustrated~Good Condition
ebay image$9.00 (1 Bid)
End Date: Friday Feb-10-2012 5:53:22 PST
Bid now | Add to watch list

Home Business Plan

Peel Away Ads Marketing And Advertising without Pop-Ups, Fly-Ins or Pop-Unders
home | Relationships site map | custom google search | Relationships articles | Privacy policy
Copyright © 2009 www.dovada.net.au